Elephants electrocuted in drunken rampage
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/21432722/
So, who knew that rice beer can get an elephant drunk? Is there such a thing as tromping under the influence? Can they have their walking licenses revoked? And, WHO pays the fines?
"But, I swear Officer..I only had two (tons) drinks!"
Tuesday, October 23, 2007
Friday, October 12, 2007
Thursday, October 11, 2007
The Bad Boyz of Blackwater
To make things perfectly clear, I am in no way supporting the U.S. occupation of Iraq. And for those of you who insist on calling our involvement in Iraq a war, let me remind you of something: Congress has not declared War; Congress just let two out of control power freaks with a hidden agenda loose on another country.
However, I am very much in support of out active duty and former military.
The Iraqi government is outraged over a shooting that took place involving Blackwater employees. And, the Iraqi government is deciding to begin governing their country in respect to attempting to actually make rules of engagement for security contractors (as opposed to actually governing their own people). So the U.S. Government has implemented rules for these contractors.
I have a couple of questions here:
1. Why is the Iraqi government suddenly interested in issues involving the deaths of civilians now? I mean, they did not seem terribly interested when the deaths of civilians were the results of car bombs set of by other Iraqi’s or Iranians, or Sunnis or Shiites. Suddenly, they are pissed off at American contractors, many of whom they themselves employ for their personal protection. I mean, really Folks!
2. The U.S. Government, through whatever means they choose (I won’t even digress here because this can go into a whole other litany of soapbox blogging) contracted Blackwater for security purposes (and other stuff, I imagine). As is not surprising, the Powers-that-Be are now throwing this company under the bus. I say this while spitting out the nasty taste in my mouth that tends to appear when spineless people appear in my peripheral vision.
But, I do want to point out that this administration brought in the Bad Boyz from Blackwater, and let them loose to help them in this occupation, and now they are gasping for breath while holding they hands to their hearts and saying “Oh, my! We really should take a look at making some kind of rules for these kids!.” This is called establishing Rules of Engagement. Along with the “If we go in, how do we get out” philosophy of combat, you seem to have forgotten all about this, Mr. Bush.
One of the reasons that people go into Special Forces, Navy SEALS, etc. is because they get to legally play with firearms and blow shit up. Then, people realize that they can do this legally in a civilian force and get paid a whole lot more to do it. They get to go to an unlawful place, make their own rules and shoot guns and blow shit up, all while looking very cool. FOR A WHOLE LOT OF MONEY! To top it all off, our own media (who are ALSO probably protected by the Bad Boyz of Blackwater) call them arrogant. Now, I have no doubt that there is some arrogance involved. After all, and at the risk of being repetitive: They get to go to an unlawful place, make their own rules and shoot guns and blow shit up, all while looking very cool. FOR A WHOLE LOT OF MONEY! I can guarantee that if I was in that position at the age of, let’s say, 28-32…Hell yeah! I’d be one arrogant little prickllet!
I guess the whole point of my little tirade is that I am, once again, disgusted with the behavior of those who represent me.
So as of right now, the cost of this occupation in dollars is: $459,084,636,564, more or less. But, the intangible cost of this occupation will take generations to figure out. Not only are we going to have to re-do a whole lot of respect- gaining from the rest of the world (who, by the way, does not have short memories, as we do), we are going to have to explain how we send in our people, cut them loose to do what they want, and then punish them for doing what we asked them to do.
This all comes down to some basic models for anything. Let me give you a hint Mr. Bush and Mr. Cheney:
1. When you occupy a country in the name of fighting terrorism, make sure to get there first covertly and plant some really good shit so you can have what is called evidence to back you up. Ask any big city cop: they'll show you how to do it.
2. When you send a bunch of boys and girls to the wild, wild, west, make sure you set some guidelines in place. Something like “Don’t shoot civilians” might help just a little bit. I know, I know, it’s hard to tell who the bad guys are, but perhaps you just might want to try. Just a little.
3. When your bad boyz get into a little trouble BE A FUCKING MAN AND BACK THEM UP!
Nuff said for now.
However, I am very much in support of out active duty and former military.
The Iraqi government is outraged over a shooting that took place involving Blackwater employees. And, the Iraqi government is deciding to begin governing their country in respect to attempting to actually make rules of engagement for security contractors (as opposed to actually governing their own people). So the U.S. Government has implemented rules for these contractors.
I have a couple of questions here:
1. Why is the Iraqi government suddenly interested in issues involving the deaths of civilians now? I mean, they did not seem terribly interested when the deaths of civilians were the results of car bombs set of by other Iraqi’s or Iranians, or Sunnis or Shiites. Suddenly, they are pissed off at American contractors, many of whom they themselves employ for their personal protection. I mean, really Folks!
2. The U.S. Government, through whatever means they choose (I won’t even digress here because this can go into a whole other litany of soapbox blogging) contracted Blackwater for security purposes (and other stuff, I imagine). As is not surprising, the Powers-that-Be are now throwing this company under the bus. I say this while spitting out the nasty taste in my mouth that tends to appear when spineless people appear in my peripheral vision.
But, I do want to point out that this administration brought in the Bad Boyz from Blackwater, and let them loose to help them in this occupation, and now they are gasping for breath while holding they hands to their hearts and saying “Oh, my! We really should take a look at making some kind of rules for these kids!.” This is called establishing Rules of Engagement. Along with the “If we go in, how do we get out” philosophy of combat, you seem to have forgotten all about this, Mr. Bush.
One of the reasons that people go into Special Forces, Navy SEALS, etc. is because they get to legally play with firearms and blow shit up. Then, people realize that they can do this legally in a civilian force and get paid a whole lot more to do it. They get to go to an unlawful place, make their own rules and shoot guns and blow shit up, all while looking very cool. FOR A WHOLE LOT OF MONEY! To top it all off, our own media (who are ALSO probably protected by the Bad Boyz of Blackwater) call them arrogant. Now, I have no doubt that there is some arrogance involved. After all, and at the risk of being repetitive: They get to go to an unlawful place, make their own rules and shoot guns and blow shit up, all while looking very cool. FOR A WHOLE LOT OF MONEY! I can guarantee that if I was in that position at the age of, let’s say, 28-32…Hell yeah! I’d be one arrogant little prickllet!
I guess the whole point of my little tirade is that I am, once again, disgusted with the behavior of those who represent me.
So as of right now, the cost of this occupation in dollars is: $459,084,636,564, more or less. But, the intangible cost of this occupation will take generations to figure out. Not only are we going to have to re-do a whole lot of respect- gaining from the rest of the world (who, by the way, does not have short memories, as we do), we are going to have to explain how we send in our people, cut them loose to do what they want, and then punish them for doing what we asked them to do.
This all comes down to some basic models for anything. Let me give you a hint Mr. Bush and Mr. Cheney:
1. When you occupy a country in the name of fighting terrorism, make sure to get there first covertly and plant some really good shit so you can have what is called evidence to back you up. Ask any big city cop: they'll show you how to do it.
2. When you send a bunch of boys and girls to the wild, wild, west, make sure you set some guidelines in place. Something like “Don’t shoot civilians” might help just a little bit. I know, I know, it’s hard to tell who the bad guys are, but perhaps you just might want to try. Just a little.
3. When your bad boyz get into a little trouble BE A FUCKING MAN AND BACK THEM UP!
Nuff said for now.
Wednesday, October 10, 2007
Doctors save poisoned tourist using vodka drip
(http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/21219366/)
A guy get poisoned from anti-freeze and ends up with a vodka drip for medicinal purposes. I wonder if I can get a rum drip for medicinal purposes. After all, this creepy little mind needs all the anesthesia it can get...
A guy get poisoned from anti-freeze and ends up with a vodka drip for medicinal purposes. I wonder if I can get a rum drip for medicinal purposes. After all, this creepy little mind needs all the anesthesia it can get...
Tuesday, October 9, 2007
Friday, October 5, 2007
Random Friday afternoon thoughts
Ugly people shouldn’t be allowed to talk. I mean, really folks. He is going to say something about how other people look. Really!? No. Seriously?
Sometimes I think that the sandwich part of the sandwich is just an excuse to eat the mayonnaise.
The sound of opening a new tampon is so awkward in the office bathroom. Now everyone knows.
Atlanta is trying to outlaw baggy pants and women wearing sports bras. This is retarded. The average rating for Atlanta public schools is 3.8 out of 10. But yes, baggy pants and sports bras are worrisome too.
I played Millionaire online today…and won!
I wonder what the lyrics to ABBA's Dancing Queen are REALLY about?
OK, that's enough for now....more later. Unless I start cracking myself up again.
...And then I saw this. Sand Ninjas!
55 Fiction Friday
My contribution this week for 55 Fiction Friday (http://wordybitch.blogspot.com/ )
Carefully crafting her answer, she stayed in silent thought for a few more minutes. Her suitor waited anxiously while praying for a positive response. After a few minutes, she answered, “Yes, I will”. Relief and joy showed on the suitors face. “But only if you include the luggage rack, cruise control, and a spare tire”.
Carefully crafting her answer, she stayed in silent thought for a few more minutes. Her suitor waited anxiously while praying for a positive response. After a few minutes, she answered, “Yes, I will”. Relief and joy showed on the suitors face. “But only if you include the luggage rack, cruise control, and a spare tire”.
Underwire Shank
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/21144171/
“Generally, McDonald said, undergarments aren't considered a danger to security.
"I don't think they're considered a weapon, really, the last time I looked," he said.”
OK. So a woman is trying to walk into a federal courthouse and cannot pass security because of the underwire in her bra. I knew there was a reason I always avoided underwire. I mean, when I end up in jail, I surely don’t want to be potentially stabbed by a homemade underwire and duck tape shank. On the other hand, if I end up in jail for any reason, perhaps it would be a good idea to be wearing an underwire bra. Good protection…on so many levels!
On top of that, I could combine the underwire and the eyelets from my shoes to make jailhouse jewelry. OK, I think I have something here. The million dollar idea! That’s it! Multi-use tool, made in jail, from underwire, duct tape, and shoe eyelets. The disguised-as-jailhouse-jewelry-but-really-a-shank multi-tool. I wonder how many cigarettes I could get for each one? Maybe even a Hershey bar or two as well…Off I go to my inventors loft!
“Generally, McDonald said, undergarments aren't considered a danger to security.
"I don't think they're considered a weapon, really, the last time I looked," he said.”
OK. So a woman is trying to walk into a federal courthouse and cannot pass security because of the underwire in her bra. I knew there was a reason I always avoided underwire. I mean, when I end up in jail, I surely don’t want to be potentially stabbed by a homemade underwire and duck tape shank. On the other hand, if I end up in jail for any reason, perhaps it would be a good idea to be wearing an underwire bra. Good protection…on so many levels!
On top of that, I could combine the underwire and the eyelets from my shoes to make jailhouse jewelry. OK, I think I have something here. The million dollar idea! That’s it! Multi-use tool, made in jail, from underwire, duct tape, and shoe eyelets. The disguised-as-jailhouse-jewelry-but-really-a-shank multi-tool. I wonder how many cigarettes I could get for each one? Maybe even a Hershey bar or two as well…Off I go to my inventors loft!
Thursday, October 4, 2007
Small sacrifices...
So, it looks like the Incas liked to sacrifice their children: http://www.cnn.com/2007/TECH/science/10/02/inca.sacrifices.ap/index.html
It seems to me that this could be very useful information for those who have unruly children. I mean what a great motivator! We had several attitude adjustment tools when I was growing up: Everything from “Just wait until your father gets home” to “Do you realize how badly this behavior can affect your father’s career!”. But the absolute most effective punishment I could barely endure was the silent treatment. Dad would just spank us and then send us out to play because it was over. Mom, on the other hand, would not speak a word to us for weeks. I would have rather been beaten to a pulp than have to endure that cold, wretched silent treatment that made me feel two inches tall. And by the way, it still works.
So, for those parents out there who are at their wits end because you cannot legally discipline your children in the manner you would like to at times, print this article out, add cool and disgusting graphics and perhaps some creative details, and paste it on the back of the bedroom door. All you’ll need to do from here forward is point to that door.
The only downside I see here is the food. According to this article, the Incas prepared their small sacrifices for up to a year by feeding them better and cutting their hair. I don’t see the sense in that. I think that adding potential starvation diets to the realm of motivational attitude adjustments just might help the situation. But then basements and chains just might be a necessity. OK, I am getting just a little carried away and too complicated now. I think I’ll stick to the cool and disgusting graphics with some creative details on the back of the door. Good luck, Parents of the World!
It seems to me that this could be very useful information for those who have unruly children. I mean what a great motivator! We had several attitude adjustment tools when I was growing up: Everything from “Just wait until your father gets home” to “Do you realize how badly this behavior can affect your father’s career!”. But the absolute most effective punishment I could barely endure was the silent treatment. Dad would just spank us and then send us out to play because it was over. Mom, on the other hand, would not speak a word to us for weeks. I would have rather been beaten to a pulp than have to endure that cold, wretched silent treatment that made me feel two inches tall. And by the way, it still works.
So, for those parents out there who are at their wits end because you cannot legally discipline your children in the manner you would like to at times, print this article out, add cool and disgusting graphics and perhaps some creative details, and paste it on the back of the bedroom door. All you’ll need to do from here forward is point to that door.
The only downside I see here is the food. According to this article, the Incas prepared their small sacrifices for up to a year by feeding them better and cutting their hair. I don’t see the sense in that. I think that adding potential starvation diets to the realm of motivational attitude adjustments just might help the situation. But then basements and chains just might be a necessity. OK, I am getting just a little carried away and too complicated now. I think I’ll stick to the cool and disgusting graphics with some creative details on the back of the door. Good luck, Parents of the World!
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